Head-On

What makes watching self destructive behavior so compelling?

I found myself asking that same question several times while watching this movie. A part of me feels maybe I like it cause I can rejoice in the fact that my life is not as screwed up as the characters I'm watching. Another part of me, the storyteller, admires the artistry and commitment of the performances.

Well whatever the reason one likes to watch these types of movies, Head-On will satisfy that need. The Turkish-German movie is a fascinating look into the lives of two socially inept individuals. They are both drug addicted, suicidal, social misfits who crash through life seemingly unaware of the damage they leave in their wake. They find friendship, convenience and respect in their relationship. But problems arise when feelings of affection, and possibly love start to develop.

The movie was a hit on the film festival circuit, and was even on Roger Ebert's Jury Prize list of Best films in 2005. (Whatever that means.)

The movie benefits greatly from the strong performances of Birol Unel and Sibel Kekilli, who fully commit to the intense roles. There is a danger in their performances which offsets the almost soap opera type arcs that the characters endure. It's tricky stuff, that in lesser hands could come off as real corny, and over dramatic, but writer/director Fatih Akin manages to carry it off with honesty and passion. The material is also structured with stylized musical interludes in between major acts in the movie, it's an obvious tribute to a theatrical Greek Chorus, which at least for me, was more amusing than dramatically effective.

The movie is full of unpredictable moments of violence, and yet has surprisingly sweet scenes of affection that are uncanny in such a dark film.

If one is looking for an adult alternative to the popcorn pg-13 fare out there on DVD, make sure to check out this tragic love story, that's sure to entertain one's dark side.

Wedding Crashers

I can't remember being so conflicted while watching a movie.

There's two radically different storylines in this movie. One storyline, the one with Vince Vaughn's character is hilarious, one of the funniest movies of the year.

Then..... unfortunately there's the other storyline with Owen Wilson's character, which is horrible, unwatchable, and insulting. Seriously a movie that's so bad that one may want to pluck their own eyes out.

It's not that Owen Wilson is bad, it's that he's given so little to work with. It's the worst kind of Pg-13 romantic comedy stuff that makes people want to ask for their money back. At one point during a stereotypical montage Owen Wilson's character, and a likeable Rachel McAdams are riding their bikes through a field with baby goats surrounding them.

I'm not lying baby fucken goats.

I haven't seen a major movie star being so blatantly upstaged since Johnny Depp's Captain Sparrow carried Orlando Bloom's character in Pirates of Carribean. It's unfortunate cause we know Owen Wilson can be funny.

What's worse is that the stuff that's SUPPOSSED to be funny in Owen Wilson's storyline is mean-spirited, and obnoxious. Half the storyline is Owen Wilson getting his ass kicked by Rachel McAdams' nightmare of a boyfriend. It's a horrible device to put Owen Wilson's character in a good light. Lazy, immature, horrible writing that made me want to kick my high definition t.v. through the wall.

I don't know who invented the rule that the love interest had to have the most obnoxious, rude, and disgusting partner while being pursued by the protagonist, but that person needs to be shot, seriously hanged, and then shot...in the head. Sure the device gains sympathy for the protagonist, but it makes the love interest look like a freaking retarded idiot. Why would the protagonist want to be with someone so fucken blind and stupid? Not to mention it makes no sense! Great, smart, attractive, woman don't hang out with dumb, obnoxious guys unless the girl is poor and needs money, the guy is good looking or famous, or if the girl had their life and her parents life saved by the guy.

The only real reason to watch the movie is for Vince Vaughn.

The guy has been funny in a lot of movies, but he really breaks out in this movie. He's really brillant, he's fast talking, likeable and razor sharp. He's also pretty dangerous, his character is wildly unpredictable, and perverted. It's really, really funny stuff. I just wish there was more of it. To me it felt like a guy had the remote control while I was watching Curb your Enthusiasm and kept flipping it to Scrubs. I'd wet myself laughing and then the guy would flip the channel to Scrubs and I'd get pissed and depressed and he'd switch it back to Curb.

Which brings me to a great idea, someone out there has to put Vaughn in a Curb your Enthusiasm type show where they just get out of the way, and let Vince Vaughn do his thing. He's old school vaudville funny, he can turn any line into a hilarious punchline, and knock it out of the park. The first 15 minutes of the movie in particular is classic, hilarious stuff as they show Wilson and Vaughn crashing weddings.

Then the fun begins to fade badly. Like when the funny, likeable, drunk friend at a party starts to get sick, and throw up while pissing his pants.

I don't know why one would make a movie called Wedding Crashers and then only spend 15 minutes showing the characters doing it. But it's a real let down. To me it feels like the studio had a good idea for a movie trailer, then realized a little late in the game they needed to make a two hour movie.

After the first 20 minutes the movie down shifts from fifth gear to park. It just stops dead, especially when Vince Vaughn is not on screen. It's pointless, absurd, bad network sitcom stuff, that's just not funny. I've heard reviews saying it's hilarious from beginning to end, and I wonder what movie they watched cause I didn't see it.

I was really looking forward to this one, and I can't really recommend it. The only way I'd recommend watching it is if one fast forwarded through any scene without Vince Vaughn.

One hand on the remote, which is hardly a way to watch a movie.

Happy FRIGGIN New Years!!!

Yeah!!!.......the passage of time.

Whatever.

I think New Year's Eve is the most over-rated holiday in the history of mankind. I've never liked the celebration. I don't get it, why choose this day to consider, and reflect on the past year. To me it's just another day. I spend every day remembering all the mistakes I made in the past week or opportunities I missed in the last month.

I don't need a special day to commemorate my fuck ups.

I remember when I was little, I was traumatized by my mom running into my room at midnight waking me from a sound sleep, and telling me to get excited cause some glass apple was dropping from a flag pole.

Seriously lame.

I can't remember a good New Year's Eve. They always are pretty stupid, lots of planning, and no pay off. At least Christmas I get presents, on July 4th I get baseball, fireworks and bbq, Thanksgiving I get Turkey, on New Year's Eve one is suppossed to get drunk......and dance.

Dance.....like there's no tommorrow.

I can....and do....get drunk at anytime. I'll get drunk to celebrate my dog barfing on the hall floor instead of the carpet. I used to dance a lot, got to clubs, and dance my ugly ass off, but that was so I could get laid. Rub up against some girl trying, usually unsuccessfully, to get them hot and bothered. I'd dance alone too, to illustrate to the ladies I didn't need their attention to have fun....even though I wasn't really having fun, just trying to look like I was having fun, so when some girl eventurally danced with me they'd THINK it was just dancing when I grabbed their ass, not just me touching their ass cause I was horny....even though I really was.

But I'm married now, I don't need to look and dance like a Backstreet Boy to pick up girls.

So now New Year's Eve is just useless, an excuse to have a lame party.

A perfect example of a typical New Year's Eve was when I was in England, (as if I'm a world traveler), a bunch of my friends and I from college were in London for a Theatre trip. All we talked about for months was how we were going to party like crazy in London on New Year's Eve. Go to Piccadilly Square, (spelled something like that, I'm too lazy to use spell check), go nuts, and drunk, kiss some hot, exotic British chick, then go to a pub with them, and get more drunk and hopefully get laid by a different hot, exotic British chick.....maybe even with both.

Yeah, right.

The night arrived, and one of us, I don't remember who, thought it would be a great Idea to check out a play we had tickets for BEFORE midnight. We didn't have anything planned, two of our friends decided that they would rather rest before the festivities.We had rented a car, so transportation wasn't an issue, the play started at 7, surely plenty of time to get back to pick our friends up before we headed up to Picadilly square, so why not?

Well the play, Blood Brothers, a british musical turned out to be pretty lame, even though our friend Louise said it would be great. We got out at around 10:30, and realized we should probably hurry back to get to our friends. We jumped in the car and promptly got stuck in horrible traffic. Actually I wouldn't really call it traffic, traffic would give one the idea that there was potential for movement.

We were not moving while the engine was on.

Eventually, my friend thought he could manuever AROUND the traffic, and decided to stray off the main road. If one knows anything about driving around London, they'll know that the streets are actually a sick maze disguised as roads. There's roundabouts, dead ends, off-ramps, and no reliable signs on the road, not to mention they drive on the wrong fucken side of the street.

Needless to say we got lost, when we tried to ask for directions, we ran into the man with the thickest Cockney accent in the world....at least I thought that was what he was speaking, it could have been Arabic for all I know. We judged from his gestures that he was telling us to go around a couple of corners and we'd be okay. But in retrospect I believe he was telling us to fuck off and we just misinterpreted. So luckily, we finally found a taxi cab, actually we almost crashed into him while we were looking for signs. My friend had the genius idea to pay the cab to drive to our hotel, while the rest of the gang followed in our car behind the cab. So I ran out of the car, and jumped into the front seat telling the cabbie to drive me to my hotel. Well, If one knows anything about Cabs in London they'll know that the cabs don't have a front passenger seat, just a flat work space. After about two minutes of trying to seem cool in the front, the cabbie "suggested" that I sit in the back seat.

The Cabbie promptly took us to the main road.....where we were once again stuck in horrible traffic. I realized this was hopeless, and paid the cabbie, jumped out of the cab, and back in the car with the rest of my friends.

Eventually.....finally, we made it to the hotel. It was 11:15. We ran out of our cars to look for our two friends, after about 10 minutes of looking we realized that they had left, angry, actually thinking we had abandoned them. At 11:30 we looked at each other, and realized it was a lost cause. There was no way we could get to Picadilly Square in time.

We decided to try something within walking distance. We had heard that there was a party in a restaurant several blocks away. We ran to the site, only to see a huge line. Our hopes were dashed. Being unusually optimistic I suggested we just run to the local pub, where we had many a night getting trashed. A few of my friends declined, giving in to the unusual bad luck. But two of my friends, and I ran full sprint to the pub, we got there with a minute to spare...only to be turned away at the door, because pub was too full.

When the countdown came, a friend decided to jump on a short wall, and peek into the pub perhaps to see what was going on inside, maybe he just wanted to see if there was any hot girls inside.

I joined him not noticing the irony of my actions.

Like always I was on the outside looking in, seeing people celebrating a silly holiday, not understanding, or experiencing the joy it seemed to bring to people.

I still don't know.

Broken Flowers

Jim Jarmusch is a Genius.

He's one of those unique voices in art that can round up the most talented artists in the business, pay them nothing, give them a script written on diner store napkins, work them like a mule, and then get thanked by those same artists, for allowing himself to be in their presence.

He's also the kind of Director that could make observing dirt blowing on an empty road seem like the most profound event of the century. In other words he can make art out of nothing.

One would think that makes the guy pretty powerful in Hollywood. But I'm sure he doesn't think of himself as all that, if he did he could be turning out movies every week in order to make money. But something tells me he's not into storytelling for the money. The guy is an artist, which is why actors want to work with him so badly.

I remember a story about how he casted Robert Benigni in Down By Law. Apparently he, and Benigni were judges in a film festival, and being the only smokers in the group, between screenings they would go out, and smoke a cigarettes together. The problem was they didn't know each other's languages. Apparently for some extended amount of time they talked to one another in broken French, which they both knew very little of, and with absurd hand and body gestures.

Brilliant.

Based on those short encounters, he felt the guy was fascinating enough to write a whole movie for. He also says that the character of the Ice Cream man, in Ghost Dog, and that whole story line involving that character was based on those same encounters.

What's also hilarious is that Jarmusch is primarily responsible for Benigni's inability to grasp the English language. What Jarmusch has done in the several times he's worked with him is "teach" him incorrect meanings to certain words. Like if Benigni wanted to reference a cup he'd "teach" Benigni the slang word for cup and say it was the word "dog". Jarmusch would them make all the crew, fellow actors etc, refer to that same cup as the word "dog". Even years after making that movie he'll use the same slang he used during filming when referring to a certain object. To this day when you watch interviews with Benigni he'll make strange references, or use incorrect words because of what Jarmusch "taught" him.

Classic.

Even if one doesn't know me, by now they can probably guess that this is going to be a positive review. I don't even have to watch the movie to say it's an amazing fucking film.

At least in my mind, the guy can do no wrong. If there's something I don't get about one of his movies, or don't like, it's probably because I'm too fucking stupid, or that I'm not SUPPOSED to understand.

In the movie Bill Murray plays Don Johnston, a ladies man who one day receives a mysterious letter informing him that he has a son, who might be looking for him. His friend Winston, a hilarious Jeffrey Wright, sparks his interest in embarking on a path down memory lane, re-connecting with past conquests to possibly find the author of the letter.

The buzz around the movie of course is for Bill Murray's performance, which is well deserved. It's subtle, sad, tragic, funny, touching and profound in a soulful way. It's similar to other characters he's played, but also remarkably unique. It's unfortunate that this performance comes on the heels of his academy award nominated performance in Lost in Translation, because it will draw inevitable comparisons.

The movie and his performance deserves to stand on it's own merit.

The movie is pitch perfect from beginning to end. It's a collaboration between two masters at the top of their game. Easily it's one of the best pictures of the year, if not the best. Although Murray is getting most of the acclaim, Jarmusch deserves equal share. I've heard the movie being referred to as his most commercial movie, and I would disagree. The movie has all of Jarmusch typical art house sensibilities, and European film influences. But the caliber of acting artists in the film is however different, to fit the tone of the film. I think the film would have suffered from a John Lurie, Roberto Benigni or Tom Waits visceral type of casting. To put that type of actor in this film would have been a jarring experience. He obviously needed actors who were adept at subtle, tight work.

There is not a wasted shot or wasted spoken word in the movie. Every frame and line of dialogue serves a profound purpose, and it's amazing to witness. Movies, especially American movies just aren't made like this.

The movie is also, on a different level, a Valentine to all women. Every encounter Don has with a female character is shot in a way that praises the virtues, and unique nature of the female species. The way Jarmusch films, and Murray encounters the female characters in the film are with a reverence, and almost awe of wonder. The way that a receptionist rubs her leg, or the way a flower girl ties a bow on a bouquet is witnessed with such affection, one would think that Don Johnston was in the midst of heavenly angels. Even in a scene of gratuitous nudity, the act is done with such a childlike innocence it becomes harmless and even charming. It's really touching and moving to see woman portrayed in this light especially nowadays when most female characters are so one dimensional.

I can't imagine liking a movie more this year. It's really a unique event that deserves all the acclaim it can get. I'm just worried that it will get lost in the flashier more so called dramatic works of awards season.

I don't want to spoil the ending, so if you haven't seen the movie stop reading now.







Like a lot of Jarmusch work, the movie doesn't have a conventional ending, and I can see some audiences getting frustrated with it. But the movie is obviously not about answers. It's about the nature of existence. Jarmusch obviously isn't about solving mysteries, he's about observing life, and it's quirky experiences. It's an amazing film once one puts that aside.

I just wish there were more movies like it.

Me and You and Everyone you know

One of the many amazing things about Miranda July's debut film is that there doesn't seem to be a tribute of vision.

The movie is uniquely her own.

One of the sad facts about modern American films is that while watching them, there always seems to be references, or tributes, or even straight rip offs of other movies. It's probably because of the success of filmmakers like Robert Rodriguez, Steven Soderbergh, and Kevin Smith.

The case is particularly true of Independent Film. Rather than trusting their own voices, filmmakers seem to be aiming to be the next Quentin Tarantino.

One finds out pretty quick while watching Me and You and Everyone you know that Miranda July doesn't give a shit what people think. She's telling a story, and telling it her way.

The movie is a quirky, stylish, and honest romance.

Notice that I didn't call it a Romantic comedy.

Sure the movie is funny, and does have the romantic comedy structure. But the movie doesn't seem too concerned about trying to make people laugh, or setting up jokes, or putting people in absurd situations. Under Miranda July's unique writing, and directing, the film is more interested in just observing the honesty of the characters. Almost like observing people in line at the grocery store. But what makes the experience unique, and theatrical is that the characters talk in a poetic simplicity, and sometimes..... to even their own surprise there is artistic poignancy, and weight to what they say and do.

It's not surprising that Miranda July is a performance artist. The film does have that sensibility, but it's not pretentious like most performance art. Instead it's heartwarming and likable.

At the heart of the movie is the story of Richard Swersey, played by Deadwood's John Hawkes, a divorced father of two, who's trying to put his life back together. At his job he runs into Christine Jesperson, a strugling, lonely, performance artist. Around these two people are other characters who share Christine and Richard's need to somehow connect in a world that's sterile, and seemingly heartless.

The movie is an enjoyable triumph. There are tons of scenes that I could describe, but I don't want to ruin it.

In lesser hands the movie could easily fall apart but Miranda July succeeds winningly, and is definitely a voice to look out for in the future. It's especially fortunate considering the lack of unique, interesting female writers, and directors in the business.

Don't let this movie slip by.

Grizzly Man

Sometimes you eat the bear, other times......
Grizzly man is Werner Herzog's fascinating documentary on the life of Timothy Treadwell. Treadwell is the man who lived amongst Grizzly Bears for 13 summers. He was an amatuer wildlife and bear preservationist, who along with his girlfriend, was unfortunately killed by the bears he was staying with in Alaska's Katmai National Park.
Most of the movie is footage shot by Treadwell himself as he observed, and mingled with the bears in their natural habitat. The documentary is interesting because it shows two sides of Treadwell's passion.
One side is the man's affection and obvious love for the bears. He claimed to be protecting the bears, and also using his experiences and footage to educate people on the lives of the Grizzly Bear.
The other side is the darker, more disturbing idea of his vanity, which showed Treadwell's fight against his inner demons, which seemed to push him closer and closer to danger amoungst the wild bears.
Herzog does a wonderful job staying objective with his character study of the man. He presents both sides of Treadwell. and the various arguments pro and con for his work.
If the viewer wants to condemn the man, all they have to do is point to Treadwell's seemingly, uneducated, reckless encounters with the bears, not to mention his emotional rants against the government, park services, and even other preservationists.
If the viewer wants to praise the man. One can point to his educational sessions with children, his honest devotion, and affection for the bears, and the fond memories of his friends.
Personally, I was struck by the devotion, and passion he showed for the bears, but seeing his footage and hearing from the man himself, I found myself questioning his motives for his so called studies.
First of all, I didn't see anything groundbreaking or even productive about his studies. To me it seemed like most of his energy went into seeing how close he could get to the bears. Almost like a daredevil who is constantly pushing himself to jump farther and higher, in search of finding his limits. And no matter what his supporters say, the man did enjoy the attention he gained from his experiences, so much so, that often times his work resembled a vain cry for attention.
In all honesty, the man was not Jane Goodall, he was not scientifically researching, and observing the bears.
I also don't see the advantage of desensitizing bears to human contact. Nothing good can from that. There is nothing scientifically productive to having bears mingle with humans. There is also plenty of evidence to suggest that the bears were not in any unusual amount of danger of poaching or human explotation, as Treadwell claims. If anything the bears themselves would be the culprits of killing their own species, albeit due to starvation caused by humanity's neglect of nature. (Which is a different argument altogether.) Than there is the unforgiveable death of his girlfriend, who was terrified by the bears, and had even threatened to break up with Treadwell because of his dark side.
But ultimately, that's all just opinion.
The movie does a fantastic job of leaving it up to one's own beliefs. Make sure to check this film out if you have the chance. It comes out on DVD on December 27th.
It's a fascinating look into an unusual man's life, told by a master storyteller.

KING KONG

There's a lot to like in Peter Jackson's King Kong, but unfortunately there's also a lot to dislike.

It pains me to criticize the movie because a part of me feels that maybe I was in the wrong state of mind while watching it.

I wasn't ready for a summer popcorn movie.

This is awards season, and when you watch a movie in December, one is expecting movies of importance. King Kong is not important, after all it's a giant ape movie. But there is historical significance to the original classic, and this movie is directed by Peter Jackson, so maybe I'm right in expecting greatness.

First off the good. The character of Kong is amazing. I must've heard about 10 times DURING the movie people saying "Wow, he looks so real." Everything from the facial expressions, to the way that he moved was impressive. It's a technical achievement that must be seen, and is a triumph on all accounts. There is also lots of creatures and bugs on skull Island that is fun and interesting. Peter Jackson does a great job of creating a new world on the island. The production design of period New York City is also impressive. Jackson does a great job of transporting us back to that period of time.

That's about it...... as far as the good stuff.

Let me just point out that Jackson was being very faithful to the original. Lots of the shots, images and plot lines reference back to the original film. But shouldn't a man of Jackson's ability take that source material, and expand on it? Make the movie more relevant and even, god forbid, more realistic? If not, why even make a remake?

Maybe I'm wrong, maybe that's not the point.

Again, a part of me feels like a scrooge picking on the movie, but there is just too much stuff that I couldn't get past. My brain just wouldn't allow me to relax, and just enjoy the movie.

The first act of the movie is just painful, and awkward to watch. First off, we find out pretty quick that Jack Black's Carl Denham is an unsavory human being. There is nothing redeemable or fun about the character. We also have movie crew members that are not interesting or memorable in any way. Then we have the crew of the ship Venture. For some STRANGE reason, Jackson spends an unusual amount of time introducing us to these characters. Especially the characters of Hayes and Jimmy. I don't know why we are introduced into their world. They have no relevance at all to the themes of the movie. It's a father and son type relationship that goes absolutely nowhere. It's an abysmal mess, and a gigantic waste of time. Then there's Naomi Watts character Ann Darrow, and her love interest, playwright Jack Driscoll, played byAdrian Brody. They are both likeable, but the script hardly gives them a chance to get to know each other, it's too busy dealing with the father-son relationship, or Carl Denhem begging everybody to trust him. Which makes it very awkward later on when Jack Driscoll risks life, limb, everything to save her.

At about an hour into the movie one starts wondering where the hell Kong is? I realize in the original that they put off showing kong for awhile because the special effects of the time were so time consuming, and they needed to pad the running time of the movie. But this isn't Jaws where we get a glimpse of the beast, we don't get teased by his actions to perk our interest. What we get is bad, long, unneccessary exposition by characters we don't give a shit about.

I mean the movie is called King Kong, and the first HOUR and 15 minutes of the movie doesn't even reference the character.

Instead we get a boring ass ship, and an unlikeable director with his forgettable movie crew.

When we finally GET to the island the movie becomes a saturday morning serial, although with amazing special effects. Which is a good, and bad thing. We have strange natives who attack for no reason,(in a awkward slow motion), there are giant bugs, dinosaurs, giant vampire bats, and of course..... eventually....finally.....King Kong.

Again, I'm trying to restrain myself. This is after all a giant Ape movie. I should have let my inner child come out, and just soak everything in. But the fact is, I expected more from the movie, and it let me down.

Let me also say the movie does have some fantastic action sequences like the fight between Kong, and the 3 T-Rex. There is also nice quiet moments between Kong and Ann Darrow on the island. The way they look at the sunset together is touching.

But thinking back, there were too many moments of extreme absurdity that my brain just couldn't get past. Like when a skull Island native pole vaults his way onto the ship to kidnap Ann Darrow. The way Carl Denham gets over the death of his movie crew members like they were drummers in Spinal Tap. The way that Ann Darrow is first handled by Kong, violently ripping her free from the constraints. Then how she is able to survive being tossed around by him as they run through the jungle is BEYOND belief. How Ann Darrow remarkably tames the beast by doing a silly VAUDEVILLE act.

I'm serious....vaudeville.

Then there is the part where characters survive a long drop, or when a character uses a tommy gun, yes a TOMMY GUN to get bugs off of Adrian Brody WITHOUT shooting HIM, or when characters unbelievably survive a stampede by dinosaurs, or when Jack Driscoll and Ann Darrow grab onto a flying giant vampire bat to escape kong, or when two characters stand ON TOP of the Empire State Building without a hint of wind to blow them off the tiny platform they are standing on. Come to mention it how DO they transport a 25 foot tall Kong to New York from far away Skull Island? How do they keep him restrained without killing him? How do they get him into a theatre without anybody seeing him? Where do they keep him when he's not rehearsing the show?

God, I'm sorry..... I AM a scrooge. Let me just say that I did enjoy the scene where Ann Darrow finds Kong in New York ,and then when they are on the ice together in central park, and he's sliding around with her in his hand. It's touching and almost magical to see the affection they have with each other. Which leads to another problem I had with the movie. The original King Kong had an effective theme of unrequited love, The Beauty and the Beast.

I'm not sure that this movie had the same theme, in fact I'm sure of it.

Ann Darrow had affection for Kong in this movie, so the theme would have to be what?
A tragic love story of two souls that could never be together?...like Romeo and Juliet.....I guess....between a Giant Gorilla........ and an actress.

Again, I just wasn't in the right frame of mind for this movie.

I'm sorry.

SIN CITY:RECUT-EXTENDED-UNRATED

The special edition dvd of Frank Miller's Sin City finally arrives, and it's worth the wait. The dvd is packed with tons of special features, and is a significant upgrade over the bare bones edition that came out several months ago.

The original theatrical cut is included on the first disc, and features commentaries by Robert Rodriguez, Quentin Tarantino and another commentary with Robert Rodriguez and Frank Miller.

The real bonus of the dvd though is on the second disc where you get extended versions of each of the stories.

The stories are seperated into 4 different movies, complete with credits. Although there isn't a significant amount of footage added, the scenes are interesting, and do contribute to the overall story. It's also a cool feature to watch each story seperately from the others, almost like reading the graphic novels. There is also a fun feature where you can watch a speeded up green screen version of the entire film, so that one can have a taste of what it's like to work on a tech heavy movie like this.

The transfer of the movie is also impressive......actually it's gorgeous. On my high definition, big screen I found that my jaw had a habit of dropping every five seconds. I can say with certainty it's the best looking dvd available. My only complaint is that in the extended versions of the movie there's no option for DTS sound. DTS sound is, however, available in the theatrical cut.

But that's nit-picking the dvd easily qualifies as a must own, it's a triumph on every account.

As far as the actual movie, my favorite story line is the The Hard Good-Bye featuring Mickey Rourke's character Marv. It's refreshing seeing Mickey Rourke doing inspired work again. I hope it becomes a trend for him and not a fluke. Clive Owen and Rosario Dawson are also solid in the The Big Fat Kill story. The final story That yellow bastard suffers from the mis-casting of Bruce Willis as a 60 year old wronged cop, and Jessica Alba, who never really looks comfortable in her own skin as the stripper Nancy.

The movie is, however, a triumph for Robert Rodriguez. Frank Miller has been reluctant to allow his Graphic novels to be filmed in the past, but he was won over by the enthusiasim of Rodriguez, and his ability to translate the novels to film faithfully. They are planning several sequels to this movie, and frankly I can't wait.

If only more film makers followed the example of Rodriguez, and treated the source material with such reverance, we'd be treated to some good work.

Especially in the comic book world where lousy translations are common.

Exorcism of Emily Rose

I'm not a big fan of the horror genre.
It's probably because I see through the conventions of the genre. I see the set up coming a mile away, the music is insulting with it's manipulation of feelings, the visual tricks don't usually surprise or scare me. It's also hard for me to feel any empathy for the characters of horror movies because they are not fleshed out or realistic. Most of the time they are all dead meat walking.
For some reason whenever I see an actor scared, or running away from a killer, I picture them in the food line at craft services on the movie set.
In other words, I'm extremely aware that they are acting.....or at least trying to act.
I can think of only three times while watching a movie that I felt genuine fear.
The dinner scene in the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, watching the movie the Exorcist, and watching the movie Poltergeist.
In the case of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, the fear I felt was more of an adrenaline rush, a visceral fear. Those are magical moments in movies, extremely rare like catching lightning in a bottle. I rarely ever feel that kind of fear while watching a movie.
In the case of the other two movies, they followed a seemingly simple formula that is inexplicably rarely used in movies, and creates a long lasting, almost traumatic type of fear.
At least for me, there's a very simple formula for creating fear in an audience.
Create the helplessness of likeable characters through science.
When you back up helplessness through science, suddenly you're stuck with something truly scary....the unknown.
It's not the special effects or sound, or music that really scares audiences. It's the idea that we can't explain why something is happening.
For me, genuine fear is created when the writer, and director go the extra mile, and put the characters through realistic medical tests, and honestly try to solve the problems through logic BEFORE giving in to the special effects.
The movie the Exorcism of Emily Rose is ambitious because it's not really a horror film. It eventually gives in to the conventions of the horror genre, but it's more of a court room drama interested in raising questions that LIGHTLY touch on the horror formula I speak of.
What's admirable about the movie is that it doesn't really try to preach to you about Religion. It has the opportunity to EASILY go that way, but in the end it respects and even honors the view of logic and science.
There are two opposing views in the film. The medical view that Emily Rose was suffering from psychotic epilepsy, and the spiritual view which was that she was really possessed..... by the devil.
Um...yeah, not realistic.
However, CINEMATICALLY.....both views are equally chilling.
The movie is loosely based on a case from Germany in 1974, the girl's name was Anneliese Michel, she was given an exorcism that failed, she died from starvation, and in the aftermath of the controversy, the church later acknowledged the girl was not actually possessed. You can check the whole story out here: http://www.moviesonline.ca/movienews_1253.html
The movie benefits from the presence of solid character actors Laura Linney, Campbell Scott and Tom Wilkinson. They give the movie a feeling of legitimacy. What's admirable is that the case of mental illness is not short changed. Sure the emotional impact of the movie leans toward the spiritual argument of the events. But everything that happens in the movie is clearly explained through science and medicine.
I don't believe the movie is a complete success however, and I can't completely recommend the film. There are soap opera type moments in the movie. One moment in particular, the death of an important witness, is just plain ridiculous, and laughably executed. I would have also liked to see more of Campbell Scott's character. Lots of the horror stuff is also not effective and unnecessary, sort of like the makers knew they needed shots for the trailer to spice up interest.
The most effective thing about the film was that for the most part, it didn't treat the audience like complete idiots.
Which is rare in horror films.

What do you see?

What do you think this picture is ?

For some strange reason, some people are unable to make out the image they are looking at. For me it's obvious. But I'm curious to see if you'll able to notice what it is. So I'll give you a minute to analyze the picture.


Okay, back?

Well if you don't know already, the picture is of Brayden.....

inside of Erin's belly. It's a sonagram image of him from about a month ago.

I was inspired by the movie 40 Year old virgin, you see there's a scene where everyone is watching a video of one of the workers unborn child, and all the other characters don't see the baby. They say things like, it's a weather chart or something silly like that.

We've only showed it to a few people, I believe my mom and Rosalyne can see the baby. But our friend Jago, and Erin's dad can't see the little guy.

If you don't see him he's laying horizontal, with his body facing towards us, and his body is towards the right of the picture. The top of his head is towards the left of the picture. You can even see some of his fingers curled under his chin.

He's basically just chillin'.

What's cool.... is that if you look even closer...... he's wearing an Angels Jersey.

We're going to get one of those 4d sonagrams in a couple of weeks, apparently it's almost as good as drilling a hole in the belly, and taking a picture through that hole. I'll post the best picture when we finally get it.

It'll be interesting to compare the two.

40 Year Old Virgin

I'm a sucker for toilet humor.

A part of me thinks I like it because uptight people find it inappropriate, rude and get so easily offended by it. I get a kick seeing, or imagining people's distasteful reaction to the jokes.

But the real reason I think I like it is because I know from first hand experience, both as a writer and actor, how difficult it can be to execute effectively that type of humor.

Right now, nobody is doing it better than Judd Apatow and his posse.

Judd Apatow, if you don't know, is the director of 40 Year old Virgin. He also produced Anchorman, Cable Guy, Kicking & Screaming, and is producing Will Ferrell & Sasha Baron Cohen's upcoming Nascar comedy and is a writer on Jim Carrey's upcoming Fun with Dick & Jane. He was also a writer on Ben Stiller's T.V. Show and created Freaks & Geeks and the underrated Undeclared.

So when I say Judd Apatow's posse I mean Will Ferrell, Ben Stiller, Jim Carrey,Vince Vaughn, Paul Rudd, and now Steve Carell.

That's a pretty powerful, not to mention freakin' hilarious group of friends.

The 4o Year-old Virgin stars Steve Carell as Andy Stitzer, the unfortunate character mentioned in the title. Andy is a the guy who collects toys and doesn't take them out of the box, he plays video games during his time off, reads and collects comic books, paints his model soldiers and uses all the money he earns buying the latest technical gadgets. One day his co-workers reluctantly invite him to a poker game, and find out his unfortunate secret. The well meaning friends than decide to aid Andy in his pursuit to shed the title of being a 40 Year-Old virgin.

The movie is everything you'll think it'll be, lots of hilarious, inappropriate humor. Yeah, it's full of sex jokes and toilet humor, but you'll also find a sweet romantic comedy that'll please your female friends when they stare at you in disbelief as you laugh at some of the more offensive humor.

What's also interesting about the movie is that the comedy is not mean spirited. The movie could easily cross into that kind of humor, but it chooses to respect and even admire the character of Andy. So much so, that it unfortunately crosses into a typical PG-13 romantic comedy, which can make the movie feel longer for some, especially now in it's 17 minute longer unrated cut.

But even critics of the film will admit that it is a coming out party for Steve Carell, he's had scene stealing work in Anchorman and Bruce Almighty, but he really carries the entire film this time, and does so impressively. Carell manages to make Andy dorky, yet sweetly affable. One can almost imagine that someone like him could have such unfortunate luck with women. Although, in reality I doubt 40 year old virgins are as normal, or kind hearted as the character in the film. In reality they are very creepy, trust me I know, they shop at my job everyday.

The rest of the cast does a solid job, standouts are Catherine Keener who, in a change of pace, plays the likeable love interest. Paul Rudd, Romany Malco, and Seth Rogan are funny as Andy's well meaning friends and Gerry Bednob and Shelley Malil are scene stealing middle eastern co-workers.

If you're in the mood for a good laugh make sure to check this movie out, and also if you watch the dvd make sure to check out the funny special features, and deleted scenes.

Time for TELEVISION

I used to hate Television Shows.

Seriously.....for about a decade.

I hated laugh tracks, commercial breaks, and in show product endorsements. I hated the simplicity of story lines, time limit story arcs, and fucking sweeps week guest stars. I hated diseased society explorations, and entertainment fluff pieces on talk shows.

I also hated the voice of the dude that said: Stay tuned for previews of next's week episode.

Come to think of it....I still hate all that stuff.

My point is, for the most part, I avoided television programming. Usually I watched sports or threw a movie onto the t.v. screen. I mean I wasn't a total movie snob, I occasionally watched Seinfeld, Star Trek, Cheers and other iconic shows.

But I wouldn't rearrange my schedule for it.

I'd have it on while I was eating Del Taco, or when I was waiting for a friend to pick me up. I'd throw the t.v. on so I wouldn't feel lonely at night, or if my mom left the television on in the living room, and I was too friggin lazy to turn it off while I was talking on the phone, you know that sort of thing.

Then something remarkable happened.

Home Box Office.

I don't know if everyone reading this has it, but if you don't you better figure out a way to afford it. Steal some money, donate some sperm or sell you body, cause you're really missing some good shit.

Seriously, it's the most remarkable stuff in ALL of entertainment.

I don't know if you've noticed from my blog, but a good movie is a rarity nowadays. I don't know if it's just that I'm a cynical bastard, or I'm just getting cranky in my old age, but most movies nowadays are just horrible.

Sometimes when I'm watching a movie that's a comedy I WISH there was a laugh track, cause I just don't get it.

I literally don't know when I'm supposed to find something funny.

All this PG-13 Lindsay Lohan, Steve Martin, underage white bread comedy drives me nuts...... And all the dramas that I watch nowadays.....I fucking find hilarious.

They crack me up.

Seriously, I can't stop laughing at how bad they are. All this life and death stuff.....the mental illness, and heart transplants. Seriously, it's like watching 2 hours of a public service announcement, or a history lesson.

I literally have to get up, and walk out of the room cause I feel the movie stealing my brain cells.

Of course, it's only funny if I've rented it for free from my job.

When I go to a movie theatre, and have to pay for a bad film.........I feel like I've been sexually violated. I walk away from the theatre shaking my head, almost in tears, scolding myself for being so stupid.

I shouldn't have put myself in that position..... to watch that piece of crap.

For whatever reason, most of the good stuff....... you'll find on the television screen.

For me the good television shows are more satisfying than a solid two hour movie.

When your watching a good show you get to watch characters grow and develop. It's more of a effective character study and complicated story arc.

In other words, more sophisticated entertainment.

It sounds odd to admit it, but it's true.

Here's a list of 10 shows mostly on H.B.O. that I've discovered recently, and I heartily recommend.

1. DEADWOOD
The best show on television. I don't care what anyone says, you won't find more interesting and fascinating characters ANYWHERE. The characters are all fully fleshed out, and complicated. Not to mention the cast. Not since Reservoir Dogs will you find such a talented, and impressive array of character actors in the business. The production design is top notch, not to mention the story lines, writing and directing.

2. Curb your Enthusiasm
The funniest show on Television. Welcome to the fictional world of Larry David. You'll witness all the quirks, and inappropriate behavior your gut can handle. Hilarious writing, impressive since the show is 90% improv.

3. DA ALI G Show
The best reality show on television. Sasha Baron Cohen and his three alternate personas will have you wetting yourself in laughter. A parody of all talk shows, everyone is in on the joke, except for the unfortunate guests, who often times reveal their ignorance, vanity, and unfortunately racism for all to see.

4. The Office (B.B.C. version)
I've never watched a show that made me laugh so hard, and tugged at my heart strings like this program. What's so great about this program was that these characters are in your life already....they just have different names. The U.S. version is pretty good too. But make sure you watch the two seasons, & the Office Special to truly appreciate it's brilliance.

5. ROME
The adventures of two grunt soldiers, Titus & Pullo, in the back drop of Julius Caesar's Rome. Sure it's soap opera entertainment, but strong acting, and wonderful production design, not to mention good writing will keep you satisfied for hours.

6. Tilt
The main reason to watch this show is Michael Madsen's Matador. But you've got poker,
con-games, revenge, pretty girls, and the Vegas back drop to keep you going when he's not around.

7. The Sopranos
The ONLY reason why this show is not number one on my list is because it takes so fucking long for them to produce the show. In between seasons you forget how truly GREAT the show is. If you need a synopsis, you're hopeless and should probably just stop reading now.

8. Extras
From the creators of The Office. The show is a great parody of the entertainment industry. What's cool is seeing all the star power contributing to the show. You just know that they all LOVED the OFFICE too, and jumped at the chance to work with Gervais.

9.The Contender
I hate reality shows. Survivor, and Big Brother are full of people who just need attention, and aren't talented enough to be actors. The Contender was a boxing contest, with struggling boxers. If you don't know it already, boxing is the toughest sport to be a success at. Even the Champions aren't guaranteed success and money, yet they put their life on the line everytime they compete. Just for the chance at glory. You can see the desperation, and hunger in each of the fighters eyes, even when they are competing in silly skills contests. Each episode ended with a challenge, and fight. Almost like Roman gladiators, two men entered, one man left. Hans Zimmer's score is incredible in the show, if you don't get emotional listening to it, go see a doctor....you're probably dead.

10. Dave Chappelle show
It was fun while it lasted. A combination of Saturday Night Live and In Living Color....only funnier. I'm not surprised Chappelle decided to stop. There was nowhere else to go but down. At least you have two seasons on dvd to watch.

I don't think there's anything groundbreaking or controversial about my list. All the shows recieved critical acclaim. But the fact that I had ten shows to watch was impressive for me, and showed me that there's exciting stuff going on in television, and hopefully a lot more down the line.