Dukes of Hazzard

Oh....Them Dukes!!! Them Dukes!!!

The good news about the movie version for The Dukes of Hazzard is that it's faithful to the original television show. The bad news is that the people that were fans of the original show are no longer 12 years old.

While watching the movie, I was surprised by how much I remembered about the old t.v show. I remembered that they were moonshine runners. I remember that the show was narrated by some country dude. I remember that the Blonde hillbilly drove the car, and the black haired dude was the one that kicked eveyone's ass. I remember that Daisy was a cock tease, who always used her goods to distract the cops while the boys were up to no good. And I remembered that there were a lot of friggin car chases which ended with the General Lee jumping off a ramp over a barn or some shit. I also remember that the voice of the Car was the butler on that Magnum P.I. show....oh shit.. my bad....wrong show.

Anyways, when I saw all that shit happening in the movie, I had a nice flash of nostalgia.....that faded about 10 minutes into the movie. The biggest problem with the movie is that the original show wasn't exactly sophisticated stuff. From what I remember the show had very little going on. It would start with a big car chase, then the episode's problem would show up, usually involving Boss Hogg's fat ass, and then it would end with a big car chase with the Duke boys and Daisy making Boss Hogg. and his cops look like dumb ass rednecks.

In other words the greatest show in the world for 12 year olds.

I'm not really sure what the studio was expecting to accomplish with this new movie version. I know it didn't really do that well at the box office. The question is why would they expect it to be a hit? I mean, how could one possibly make a great movie out of such a thin premise. My theory is that the studio heads just wanted to see someone sexy wear those damn Daisy Duke shorts. I mean that's all they ever talked about were those damn Daisy Duke shorts. I remember Brittany Spears wanted to do the movie so she could wear the shorts, and then Mandy Moore was supposed to do it, and then finally Jessica Simpson got the role. Then all the ads, posters and publicity was about Jessica Simpson wearing the damn shorts. I think the special features on the DVD are all about those Daisy Duke shorts. There's also a music video with Jessica where she shakes her ass wearing Daisy Dukes.

I mean I'm not complaining I like to see girls wear those shorts, but I can pick up a Maxim magazine for that. I don't need to watch a full length movie with a cock tease wearing those shorts. I'm used to watching porn where they wear the shorts for about half a minute, and then they fucking come off. Because most people don't like to get cock teased for two hours.

The truth is the only reason why I watched the movie was because the Broken Lizard gang made it, and to tell the truth, I'm a sucker for toilet humor. Unfortunately, this movie didn't have a lot of toilet humor. Just a lot of car chases, and Jessica Simpson scratching her ass, and bending over. Disappointing cause I liked Club Dread, I know I'm probably in minority, but I had some good laughs watching that movie, and it kept me entertained the whole time.

Burt Reynolds basically does a cameo in the movie as Boss Hogg. Johnny Knoxville and Seann William Scott are affable guys in the movie, they don't have much to do though, pretty much sit in the car, and look around so I can't really rip them to shreds cause they are just doing what they're supposed to do. This ain't Hamlet they're doing here, it's the Dukes of friggin Hazzard.

One sequence I will criticize though is where the Duke boys find out that Boss Hogg wants to turn Hazard county into a coal mine. They find out, when a sample they test blows up in the boys face....leaving them with black faces. They run off into the General Lee and drive into the hood. If you don't know already, the General Lee happens to have a big confederate flag on the roof of the car. So of course when they drive into the hood, they see some Afro-Americans hanging out, who mistake the whole scene for racist taunting......yeah real funny.....black face humor.

Horrible.

I expected more from EVERYONE involved. Just not funny.

Stick to the dick and fart jokes Broken Lizard your good at that. No need to change the formula.

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Fantastic Four

It's Clobberin' Time!!!

I guess.

I'm not a big fan of this comic book. My buddy Lons over at Crushed by Inertia insists that a good movie can be made with the material. He says if you put it in it's original time period, played up the campiness, let Doctor Doom be his megalomaniac self, it can be a fun movie in the mold of "The Rocketeer".

I, on the other hand, need my comic books, or should I say Graphic Novels, to be a little more cynical. In my experience, the only time I liked reading the Fantastic Four is when they crossed over into the other hero's story lines, like if the Avengers needed back up, or if the Hulk was going on one of his mindless rampages, and the Fantastic Four was in his way. I also liked it when Sub-Mariner showed up cause he had a huge hard-on for Susan Storm. (Sorry dude, can't compete with Reed Richard's brain, not to mention his sexually pleasing, maniupulating, transforming Penis.)

On their own, however, I didn't really find the comic book interesting. For one, the Bad Guys were boring. Except for Doctor Doom, they were always dealing with Bad Guys like Mole Man, Puppetmaster, or Galactus. I think Silver Surfer, showed up now and again. Eventually it got so boring, to spice things up Richards and Storm ended up having a Son who becames a spolied God or something. Sorry, just not my bag, man.

As far as the superheroes themselves, for the most part they were also pretty boring. The powers of the Fantastic four are only cool if they decided to use them for evil. What does a super hero need to be invisible for anyways? Most super villans aren't scared of Fire. I guess stretching your body is pretty cool, but who's afraid of a rubber band, and didn't they give that same super power to the Chick in the Incredibles? So the dude has a Chick power.

The Thing on the other hand is pretty tragic. He's basically deformed, he's a freak that has super strength, but what Girl is going to go for a deformed freak who feels like coarse rock. And if there's one thing that Ben Grimm NEEDS it's tail. In the comic he hates being the Thing, all he ever wants is to turn back to being human, presumedly so he can get laid. If there's any hope for a interesting movie it lies in this character. But when your dealing with heavy subjects like self hate, depression, and deformity, will there be enough time to sell action figures? Unless your Chris Nolan, or Brian Singer, I seriouosly doubt it.

So it comes as no surprise to me that the movie ends up being exactly what I think it'll be: a
Pg-13 popcorn, puff piece. Lots of sound and fury signifiying nothing. Everyone involved in the movie do their best to make everyone happy, while trying not to embarress themselves and not offend anyone.

Mission accomplished.

The movie is utterly forgettable, maybe some kids will dig the special effects, but for the most part I had trouble staying awake.

The movie begins with Reed Richards and Ben trying to convince old buddy Doom to let them join him up on Doom's personal space station. Yeah, that's right, bitch, his personal Space Station. Turns out he built the thing to get into Jessica Alba A.K.A Sue Storm's pants. (Shit, wouldn't you if you had the money). The reason why Reed Richards, and Ben want to go up there is to study some space cloud that could potentially cure cancer, or Spinal Bifda, cure retardation in kitty cats or some shit. Of course, when they all go up there, all hell breaks out and the Fantastic Four.... or shall I say Five is born. Yup, Doom gets zapped with powers too. At this point, you obviously realize this movie is not aimed at the hard core fans of the comic.

What follows is a half hour of them trying to figure out they have powers, then Stan Lee shows up for his paycheck, er, I mean cameo, and then the last half hour is spent with them actually using their powers. The movie is obviously trying to set up a potential franchise, something I think they accomplished cause the movie inexplicably made bank.

Criticizing the actors, or directors, even the writing isn't really worth it. They all showed up, did their job, and went home, hoping to make some money.

It worked.....Unfortunately.

Lakers Loyalty

I was born a Laker fan.

One of the few memories I have of my father, is the passing of his allegiance of the Lakers Nation. When I first learned to play the game I remember trying to mimic the unique shooting style of Jamal Wilkes. When I learned to play the game better, my best shot was the sky hook that I saw Kareem Abdul Jabbar utilize to perfection every game on my television screen. When I grew older I wore my socks high like Michael Cooper, which look especially lame now when I look at old pictures, cause I wore those tight Ocean Pacific corduroy shorts.

I cried, like a bitch, when Magic Johnson retired due to the H.I.V virus, and I teared up in happiness when he returned to the 90's LakeShow. I still have the ticket stub to that game.....Against Golden State..... At the Forum.

When the Lakers struggled through the 90's I remained loyal.

I thought Sedale Threat played with heart. I liked watching Orlando Woolridge dunk the ball with authority. I was comforted by the solid rebuilding process that Jerry West was putting together. Players like Anthony Peeler and George Lynch showed great promise. Nick Van Exel and Eddie Jones were amazing draft picks.

Then came Jerry West's crowning achievement.

The signing of Shaq.

And perhaps Jerry West's biggest mistake....

The trade for Kobe Bryant.

Of course it's hard to criticize three championships. But in retrospect, the fall of Laker Nation is traced back to the trading of Vlade Divac for the High School star from Lower Merion. There's no denying the athletic ability of Kobe Bryant, there are moments of athletic brilliance that defy description.

But the issue with Kobe has never been talent, it's a matter of leadership character.

One has to question the leadership qualities of a person who would demand the dismissal of the greatest single weapon perhaps in all of N.B.A. history. For those that would argue that Kobe didn't ask for Shaq to be traded, well the truth is, he didn't demand that he stay either.

From what it looks like, Kobe wanted to be the undisputed leader of the Lakers. He got his wish.

Ownership obliged by sending away one of the most dominate, personable, popular, not to mention marketable players in N.B.A. history.

Not only sending him away, giving him away. For non all-star caliber players.

But this is old....Bitter....News. The issue at hand is Lakers Loyalty.

The term loyal is defined as firm and not changing in your friendship with or support for a person or an organization, or in your belief in your principles.

In the sports world, there is nothing more taboo than lack of loyalty.

That's why it pains me when I admit that my loyalty in the Lakers has been shook.

The truth is, as much as I try I can't feel enthusiasm for a one man team. Which is exactly what Kobe's Lakers are. Ownership has basically passed the keys of the Porsche, over to the spoiled 15 year old kid, and told him he can do whatever he wants.

And what he wants is to shoot the ball.....A lot. 35 times a game sometimes. What's especially frustrating is that he doesn't see the harm in not getting his teammates involved. He thinks that it's good for the team when he does it.

I used to think that people that talked like me were fair weather fans. Bandwagon fans that complained when the going got tough, and cheered when they suddenly turned good.

But I don't feel like a fair weather fan, because I've been through the bad times. The truth is it's not really that bad.

Trust me, I was a California Angels fan growing up. I don't mind losing.

What I mind is the destruction of the team concept. For me there is no pleasure in watching a player be selfish, no matter how effective he is. It's not exciting, or entertaining. To me, it's sickening. Like watching a guy masturbate. To me it's not sexy. No matter what the guy looks like.

When I watch and try to cheer Kobe's Lakers, I feel like I'm supporting selfish behavior. That really pisses me off. Cause I'm a Los Angeles Lakers fan, I like to wear my Lakers gear, and not feel embarrassed by what it represents.

That's why I believe that by criticizing the Lakers, at this point in time, I'm actually being more loyal than most so called fans.

REAL fans shouldn't support a one man team. The Showtime Lakers were not a one man Show. Neither were Jerry West's Lakers. The Lakers to me, always represented the epitome of team work.

Shaq and Kobe realized in order to win a Championship they needed to trust Horry, Fisher, and Fox. We all saw that. I just don't get why now after all the Championships Kobe doesn't realize it. He actually believes that his selfish actions are best for the team.

Why should loyal fans support that behavior?

I hate sounding like a Kobe basher. Cause I'm not, I just don't think his selfish mentality is best for the team. I keep waiting for him to mature, but it's not happening. It'll probably never happen.

Certainly Kobe Bryant doesn't deserve all the blame. Mitch Kupchak and Jerry Buss deserve it too. They've made horrible, idiotic moves.

But if fans keep coming to games, and buying the merchandise, they can argue that they are only giving the fans what they want.

So until the Lakers make a move to change the make up of this one man team. The only way for fans to show true loyalty ...Is not to support the team.

Unfortunately, as the saying goes, it hurts me more than it's going to hurt you Jerry Buss.

But in the long run......it'll be for the best.

Rent

I find it ironic that I'm choosing the movie version of Rent as my first review. I was a Theatre major in College during 1996 and every theatre nerd had the Soundtrack blaring in their cars, dorms, and Sony Walkman's, ( you know the things we had before ipods). I was so sick of the damn soundtrack, I refused to go see the play, turning down numerous offers to see it. I was happy in holding the distinction of being one of the few theatre major graduates in the world never to see a production of the play. In my mind, I felt the play was probably over-rated, and probably resembled Trey Parker and Matt Stone's parody in Team America.

But being the married bitch that I am now, when my pregnant wife wants to watch a movie, I gotta appease her, it's the least I could do for making her carry my unborn child in her belly.

The artistic genesis of the the musical production of Rent probably has as much drama in it, as the actual play itself. A modern day adaptation of the opera La Boheme, the play tells of artistic modern day Bohemian youth struggling through life, and love in New York, cast against the background of Drug use and the 90's AIDS crisis.

Adding extra emotional Gravitas to the production is the shadow of the untimely demise of the musical's playwright: Jonathan Larson. Who at the age of 35 died, unexpectedly, the night after the show' s final dress rehearsal, tragically never getting to experience the plays monumental success.

A Pulitzer Prize, some Tony's, as well as Obie awards, not to mention countless national, and international critical kudos later, Chris Columbus of Harry Potter and Home Alone fame, now brings us the movie version of the now legendary Broadway American musical.



Unfortunately, this movie version is not immune to the epidemic affecting most American movies today. The dreaded PG-13 rating. Gone is the operatic talk singing between musical numbers, instead we get audience friendly, awkward rhyming dialogue plucked from those same talk singing scenes. The movie also clocks in at a more family friendly two hours, and 15 minutes running time, cut down from the three hour play version. Not surprisingly, the edgier more provocative numbers, and phrases in the music is cut down, and sometimes completely cut out. All in an effort to reach the broadest possible audience, and achieve a PG-13 rating.

But what is most disappointing about the movie is the uncomplicated almost t.v. movie approach to the material.

Rather than contributing something artistically challenging, or inventive, Chris Columbus chooses to share the material with a standard music video approach. Perhaps feeling too much reverance for the source material. Basically putting the actors in story appropriate locales, and nailing the camera to the floor. In effect, he give us a castrated version of the musical in the process. This is disappointing because if ever a musical screamed for a strong, inventive artistic vision, or if a play was open to experimentation with the source material, it's RENT.

The original stage production is presented in a blank, multi-leveled black stage, the musical relies on sparse props and little or no sets, instead depending on the charisma of the actors, and the strength of the music and dramatic writing. Obviously, in film, you can't depend on such abstract settings, (unless it's the stylized movie Dogville, well actually, not even then).

The material demands a strong artistic vision when translating it to film, more importantly an interesting idea, to bring the material to life, which is why stylized directors like Spike Lee, and other independent film makers were at one time attached to the project.

Ironically, one of the strengths of the movie, is also one of it's shortcomings. Although, it's refreshing, and commendable that Chris Columbus invited the original cast back for the movie version. The truth is, it's almost been 10 years since the actors first performed the play, most of the cast is a little long in the tooth to be singing about "No Day But Today" , and play young 20 year olds who protest big business corporations, and rail against "the man".

In all honesty they were probably too old to play the parts back then, now a decade later, it's just plain ridiculous.

Rosario Dawson does, however, surprise as she more than holds her own vocally in the role of Mimi. One gets the sense that she loves singing the songs with the original cast. Almost like she sung along with them in the shower for years, and now she's finally getting the chance to share the stage.

The rest of the cast, however, have a been there done that kind of feeling to their perfomance. It's hard to imagine that they would feel anything but that, since they've probably performed the songs hundreds of times. Not helping things, is the elimination of the talk singing. You get the sense, even the actors feel that the material shoudn't be done this way. Especially after musical numbers, when they stand around awkwardly, seemingly waiting for the scene to fade to black, or when their converted dialogue starts to sound like bad rapping without a beat.

The undeniable strength of the movie, however, has to be in the music. Jonathan Larson's music doesn't suffer at all in the translation to film. Although I'm not a big musical theatre lover, I did find myself humming bars, and trying, I stress trying, to sing phrases in the privacy of my own space days later. The cast does a great job vocally, it's just a shame that the other artistic elements couldn't match the inspired music, and vocal interpretation of the material.

About Ray Manukay

* Industry: Internet / Entertainment
* Occupation: Customer Service Representative, Administration Assistant, Social Media Manager and Web content specialist
* Born & Raised: Los Angeles : California : United States

Ray Manukay is a passionate and opinionated sports and film enthusiast. Currently living in Orange County, California. 

He currently serves as a Ticket Services Representative and Administrative Assistant for the Angels Baseball ticket department. In this role, he processes season seat printing, mini-plan packages, and game-day ticket orders, while also managing mailings, mobile deliveries, gift certificate purchases, and stadium tour sales. During home games, he staffs the front office lobby, resolving patron ticketing issues and managing premium "Will Call" services. ​

In addition to his work with the Angels, he is a part-time Box Office Representative for OC Vibe at the Honda Center and work in Audience Services for the Segerstrom Center for the Arts. His previous experience includes roles as a Ticket Seller and Customer Service Representative for AEG (at the Crypto.com Arena formerly Staples Center, Microsoft Theater, and Novo Theater) and the Segerstrom Center, where I worked across the box office, call center, and subscriptions departments. 

 Earlier in his career, He specialized in digital marketing and content creation. 

As an Online Community Operative at Ayzenberg Group, He executed high-profile social media campaigns and community outreach for clients like EA Games, Yahoo and EA Sports. He also has extensive experience as a content editor and copywriter for various startups. 

At Mahalo.com, He served as a Web Content Manager, where he utilized SEO expertise and traffic analysis to manage a wide array of topics and lead a small remote team of researchers. He also worked as a part-time shift manager at Laser Blazer, a popular DVD store in Los Angeles for several years.

Ray is also a member of the Screen Actor's Guild and was a working actor for several years. He attended college at Chapman University where he studied theater performance. He has been nominated several times for the Irene Ryan Acting Award for performance and has received several meritorious achievement awards from the American College Theatre Festival for playwriting and directing. Ray has performed with Shakespeare Orange County, Fullerton Resident Theatre Company, Long Beach Playhouse, South Bay Center for the Arts, Rancho Santiago College and was a recipient of a full scholarship with the prestigious Shakespeare & Company in Massachusetts in Lenox.

Ray Manukay

RayManukay@gmail.com

Linked In: http://www.linkedin.com/in/raymanukay 

Objective:

To work with a talented and dedicated team to produce high quality work in a challenging and exciting, fast paced environment.

Experience:

Ticket Services Representative Angels Baseball

September 2022 – Present

• Customer Service Representative

• Administrative Assistant

• Office opening and closing

• Season Ticket and Group Sales processing and printing

• Online support

Ticket Seller Angels Baseball

February 2016 – September 2022

• Customer Service

• Box Office Ticket Sales

• Ticket support

• Cashier

• Customer Satisfaction

Ticket Seller OC Vibe at Honda Center

June 2016 – Present

• Customer Service

• Box Office Ticket Sales

• Terminal Sales

• Cashier

• Phone Service

Audience Services Segerstrom Center for the Arts

October 2024 – Present

• Ticket Taker

• Customer Service

• Wheelchair service

• Cashier

• Customer Satisfaction

Ticket Seller Staples Center

September 2018 – October 2021

• Customer Service

• Box Office Ticket Sales

• Terminal Sales

• Cashier

• Customer Satisfaction

Box Office, Call Center, SubscriptionsSegerstrom Center for the Arts

October 2016 – September 2017

• Call Center Representitive

• Box Office Ticket Sales

• Terminal Sales

• Subscriptions Administrative Support

• Customer Service

Social Media Community Operative, Ayzenberg Group

November 2011 – April 2014

• Tracking sentiment using JitterJam

• Community manager for Twitter and Facebook

• Message Board Moderator

• Customer Service

• Branding

Social Media Manager, Independent Contractor

April 2009 – 2011

• Managed web sites

• Organized and utilized Social Media Marketing campaigns

• Wrote and created network of blogs. (Blogger, Wordpress)

• Content Editor

• Marketing assistant

Web Content Editor, Mahalo.com

February 2007 – April 2009

Salary: $40,000 plus benefits

• Managed web pages

• Wrote news articles and biographies

• Managed part-time employees, assigned research topics

• Web research and organization

• Search engine optimization

Shift Manager, Laser Blazer

March 2003 – 2009

Salary: $32,000

• Opening and closing store

• Manage inventory

• Supervised employees

• Customer service and Cash Register 

Merchant Teller,  Bank of America

February 1990 – February 1997

Salary: 30,000

• Bank Teller 

• Customer Service Representative

• Cash management 

Education:

Chapman University

BFA in Theatre Performance 

Orange, California

St. Bernard High School,

High School Diploma

Playa Del Rey, California

To read recommendations for Ray Manukay visit the article Recommendations for Ray Manukay.

Performance Reviews

Macbeth:

"Raymund Manukay’s Macbeth, without delving too much into detail and subtext, is a forthright and honestly confused political parvenu. He doesn’t understand his failures, thinking he’s totally right to begin with, and especially in his “Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow” speech on hearing of Lady Macbeth’s death, Manukay has a reserve and a distracted air that is effective." - October 20, 1998, Los Angeles Times

Cloud Nine:

"All the actors deftly carve portraits of characters making the uncomfortable transition between eras. Raymond Manukay is exceptional as the boy in servitude to the African raj and as the career-conscious Martin in Act 2."
- October 16, 1997, Los Angeles Times

Ah, Wilderness:

Raymund Manukay stands out for his naturalism and reserve as the crafty salesman who lures Belle away from a tiddly Richard."
- March 26, 1998, Los Angeles Times

Equus:

"As the stable owner who hires Alan and furthers his passion for horses, Raymond Manukay is solid and strong." - October 25, 1999, Los Angeles Times